[ well. she's fairly sure she isn't dead. although she was ready to do whatever it would take to save ravka. at the end of the day, one life is a small price to pay, if that's what it cost to exert the full might of her power. ]
We could always test your theory if you're so confident.
Generous as that offer may be, ( his voice remains smooth as glass, seemingly unaffected by the threat. because that's all it really is — a threat. toothless. )
I wonder if you have what it takes. Immolation is an ugly death.
( though, really, there are few deaths that aren't. )
And I think you're still young enough to think yourself merciful.
[ she purses her lips, turning her head away from him in confirmation that he is indeed right even if she is hard pressed to admit it. a murder in cold blood is too much, even if it's him. maybe especially because it's him. ]
I will do what I need to preserve the future of Ravka.
( mildly; he would tell her that in that they are agreed, commonly aligned, even, but she already knows that and will challenge him on it.
which would be entertaining if they weren't stranded in some foreign land. )
But we are far from Ravka, at present. ( for all that his tone doesn't dip beyond conversational mildness, he is troubled by this. by the uncertainty of it.
he also doesn't like to admit to how strange it feels, being here. not quite a weakness but almost like he's blurred at the edges. less solid. his attempts to use his power have, if anything, only made matters worse. )
[ of course, they're equally stuck here. but part of alina always knew that she would likely bear whatever fate became the darkling too. they are entangled.
And why should I care for the people, here? Their plight is not my own.
( simply put.
oh, he will use them and discard them as needed because that was all the otkazat'sya were good for, but.
well. he could be perfectly civil. he'd held his tongue while serving the ravkan monarchy for centuries. what is a few days, weeks or even years in a foreign court? )
Have you ever cared for others outside of their utility to you?
[ she thought that... maybe her. once. he had seemed to resent the humanity of honest desire, while she rejected the parts of it that wanted her for the ways she could serve him. ]
[ she pauses, for a moment. truly, grisha had only been tolerated in ravka because of their utility to the king. but it was an arrangement fostered by the darkling. he is their patron, shelter in a world that is afraid of people like them and seek to destroy them if they toe the line.
her face sours at the thought. the world is cruel, but not all men are like the king. the darkling. the apparat. not all men seek only to use her for what role she can play, right?
the darkling may have protected the grisha, but that didn't mean he didn't have his motives. ]
A means to an end.
[ a shield to hide his true intentions while he waited. a source of gifts to earn favor. he would not have cultivated it if it was not to his own benefit. there is no freedom under the darkling. ]
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( this is news. the last time they'd seen one another she'd certainly intended to die and take him with her.
does this mean that he truly is alive? or that she's simply in denial. does it truly matter? )
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We could always test your theory if you're so confident.
[ can't die in the afterlife. right? ]
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I wonder if you have what it takes. Immolation is an ugly death.
( though, really, there are few deaths that aren't. )
And I think you're still young enough to think yourself merciful.
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I will do what I need to preserve the future of Ravka.
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( mildly; he would tell her that in that they are agreed, commonly aligned, even, but she already knows that and will challenge him on it.
which would be entertaining if they weren't stranded in some foreign land. )
But we are far from Ravka, at present. ( for all that his tone doesn't dip beyond conversational mildness, he is troubled by this. by the uncertainty of it.
he also doesn't like to admit to how strange it feels, being here. not quite a weakness but almost like he's blurred at the edges. less solid. his attempts to use his power have, if anything, only made matters worse. )
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[ of course, they're equally stuck here. but part of alina always knew that she would likely bear whatever fate became the darkling too. they are entangled.
a prison or death. does it really matter? ]
I will still stop you from harming anyone here.
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( simply put.
oh, he will use them and discard them as needed because that was all the otkazat'sya were good for, but.
well. he could be perfectly civil. he'd held his tongue while serving the ravkan monarchy for centuries. what is a few days, weeks or even years in a foreign court? )
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[ she thought that... maybe her. once. he had seemed to resent the humanity of honest desire, while she rejected the parts of it that wanted her for the ways she could serve him. ]
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( he pins her with the kind of look that suggests he already knows what she'll say, and that it will be the wrong answer. )
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her face sours at the thought. the world is cruel, but not all men are like the king. the darkling. the apparat. not all men seek only to use her for what role she can play, right?
the darkling may have protected the grisha, but that didn't mean he didn't have his motives. ]
A means to an end.
[ a shield to hide his true intentions while he waited. a source of gifts to earn favor. he would not have cultivated it if it was not to his own benefit. there is no freedom under the darkling. ]