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« solntse » TEXT ✧ AUDIO ✧ VIDEO ✧ ACTION ALINA STARKOV ✦ GRISHAVERSE
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[wraithes]

[ it's less difficult and more a pragmatic acceptance of her circumstances in life. men like nikolai (not nikolai himself, but men like him, men with power and prestige and title and lineage) have done nothing but harm her. bought her, sold her, used her, and tossed her aside for the next. the only reason inej is not dead is because kaz brekker found her at the perfect moment -- and, well, a steeled determination to not die like some helpless rabbit trapped in a snare.

and what alina says does warm her a little, but: ]

We - Suli, Grisha - need to stop acting like the people with all the power in the world are helpless to do the right thing without our guidance.

It isn't your job to make Nikolai Lantsov a good king, Sankta Alina.
It is his.

And if he fails to save Ravka, then maybe the real question isn't whether Nikolai was a good king.
It's whether Ravka can be saved at all.

[solmate]

[ Ah... Alina knows Inej is right, but the stark truth of it is difficult for her on the other side of the screen. No, that is not her job. She is not Ravka's Queen. The fact that she could even be a Queen is both because of and in spite of being Grisha.

Her story is written though. She gives her life so Ravka even has the chance to prevail.

That does not mean they deserve it.

(What would Inej think of her saint, so easily wavering from the sacrifice that is asked of her? What small ask is her light versus a nation? The world?) ]

you're right.
ravka is my home, although it has not always loved me back.
and i need to keep trying for the people there that can be saved.

[wraithes]

[ inej has no love lost for ravka. it hasn't ever seen her, or her people. most ravkans wouldn't consider inej ravkan to begin with, and that suits her just fine. she could give half a damn what ravka thinks of her. ravka didn't fight to save her from the slavers. and ravka didn't listen to her people's pleas for safety during their wars. and ravka certainly didn't give a damn when the fold tore through her people's lands.

but alina doesn't necessarily have it so easy. to just forsake ravka as a country.

so: ]

If I gave up on every thing or every person that has hurt me, I would have nothing.

[ how many times has she gotten into it with kaz in the years since he found her at the menagerie? all the fighting and anger and jagged pieces running along one another, just to wind up where they are now. but even with him, there had to be a line. she couldn't continue pouring her heart into something that wasn't going to give her love in return. ]

Most things are worth saving, and fighting for.
If nothing else, the people of Ravka deserve saving.
Most of them just want to be free.

[ freedom from war, or enslavement, of poverty. freedom to move throughout their country, freedom to live without fear. that's worth fighting for. and maybe, once those things are secured, true peace can come. but until all of ravka's jagged edges are made whole, there will be no peace. and inej won't fight for something that won't fight for her. ]

[solmate]

that's all i ever wanted. to be free.

[ That is not necessarily compatible with being a saint, but she cannot put herself above all those who need her. ]

we have that chance now, at least.
so... a pet?

[wraithes]

[ it's a bizarre thought to her, that someone who is so revered and beloved doesn't feel she's free. but inej supposes that that much is true . . . every ravkan diplomat and politician, fighting to own sankta alina's light. how suffocating, and horrible.

just further proof that the country isn't worth it, to inej. but the people usually are.

inej lets it drop, for now. but she tucks that thought away. ]

A pet.
Are you free now?

[solmate]

i am.

[ Free in more ways than one, Alina thinks. For now. ]

shall i meet you at your apartment?

[wraithes]

Good.

[ on all counts. freedom is a precious thing. ]

And sure.
Kaz went to explore the department store.

[ which inej is certain he will both love and hate, but he's not around at the moment. perfect time to have guests. and also sneak a bird into the house. ]

[solmate]

i'll see you soon.